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125 Funny Birthday Jokes: Hilarious Riddles & Silly Puns

Take the edge off of aging with these amusing birthday jokes.

Looking for the perfect way to sprinkle humor on a birthday celebration? Whether it’s a cute quip for your kid or a hilarious roast for your coworker, I’ve got you covered.

Your search for the perfect blend of funny birthday jokes, silly puns, and riddles ends here. My list of 125 hilarious birthday jokes caters for men, women, children, and everyone in between.

So, arm yourself with my rib-tickling collection next time you want to elevate your “Happy Birthday” wish. Trust me; I’ve baked these jokes with the same love you’d put into a birthday cake. Time to share a slice of humor!

Short Birthday Jokes

Short Birthday Jokes Icon

These 25 birthday jokes are short but, of course, sweet. Get straight to the point with these brief but snappy birthday jokes. They’re fantastic for friends and for coworkers or for quickly making your loved one laugh on their special day.

  1. Where do you find a birthday gift for a cat?
    A cat-alog.
  2. If you’re going to take a nap at this age, let me know.
    I don’t want to bury you by accident.
  3. What do you say to a bunny on its birthday?
    Hoppy birthday to you.
  4. What was the elephant’s birthday wish?
    A trunk full of gifts.
  5. Why don’t kids remember their past birthdays?
    Because they’re too focused on the “present”.
  6. What’s hairy and covered in fondant?
    Coconut cake.
  7. What goes up and never comes down?
    Your age!
  8. Why did the robber break into the bakery?
    He heard the cakes were rich.
  9. You know you’re getting old when you realize that the only thing you want to exercise is caution.
  10. What’s a bee’s favorite day of the year?
    It’s bee-day.
  11. What does a birthday cake have in common with playing baseball?
    They both need batters.
  12. What kind of cake did Peter Pan get?
    A pan-cake.
  13. What is a tornado’s favorite party game?
  14. What did one candle say to the other?
    “Don’t birthdays just burn you up?”
  15. Why do candles always go on top of a birthday cake?
    It would be too hard to light them from the bottom.
  16. What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus have in common?
    They were all born on holidays.
  17. Why didn’t anyone say Happy Birthday to the owl?
    It didn’t give a hoot.
  18. Which side is the left of a birthday cake?
    The side that hasn’t been eaten yet.
  19. What do you say to a female sheep on her birthday?
    Happy birthday to Ewe!
  20. What do you sing to a snowman on his birthday?
    “Freeze a jolly good fellow…”
  21. What do you always get on your birthday?
    Another year older.
  22. Why did the child hit his cake with a hammer?
    It was pound cake.
  23. What does a cat eat on its birthday?
    Cake and mice cream.
  24. What do you call a birthday bash you throw for a dog?
    A ball.
  25. Where do kids get ice cream cakes on their birthday?
    Sundae school.

Funny Birthday Dad Jokes

Funny Birthday Dad Jokes Icon

Whether you’re a dad who wants to make your family laugh or you’re a kid who wants to make your dad laugh, I’ve got 25 corny jokes to share with you! They might be cringe and a little stupid, but they are fantastic for fathers.

  1. I always get emotional on my birthday.
    Even my cake is in tiers.
  2. What kind of cake do you eat if you’re tired on your birthday?
    Coffee cake.
  3. Age is a relative thing.
    All my relatives keep telling me how old I am.
  4. What do statistics show about people who have the most birthdays?
    They live the longest.
  5. The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
  6. What happens when thieves crash a birthday party?
    They take the cake.
  7. Why did the cupcake go to the doctor?
    It was feeling crumby.
  8. Why do people write on birthday cakes?
    Because they want to have their cake and read it, too.
  9. Why did the cupcake cross the road?
    It had muffin else to do!
  10. Birthdays are nice and all, but too many can kill you!
  11. Why did the girl put her cake in the freezer?
    She wanted to ice it.
  12. What do you say to your goldfish on its birthday?
    Have a fin-tastic day.
  13. Why did the mushroom always get invited to birthday parties?
    He’s a fun guy.
  14. What do cows sing at birthday parties?
    “Happy birthday to moooo!”
  15. What type of music is scary for birthday balloons?
    Pop music.
  16. How do pickles celebrate their birthday?
    They relish it.
  17. I used to be a boy trapped in a woman’s body.
    But after nine long months, I was finally born!
  18. Which year is your birthday?
    Every year.
  19. When is a birthday cake like a golf ball?
    When you slice it.
  20. What did the birthday card say to the stamp?
    Stick with me. We’re going places.
  21. What did one chicken say to the other on its birthday?
    “Have an egg-cellent birthday.”
  22. How does a cat celebrate its birthday?
    It turns up the meow-sic.
  23. What does every birthday end with?
    The letter ‘Y’.
  24. How do people celebrate birthdays in heaven?
    With angel food cake.
  25. What do you give a 3,000-pound rhino for its birthday?
    I’m not sure, but you better hope they like it!

One-Liner Birthday Jokes

One-Liner Birthday Jokes Icon

Need to get a quick laugh? One-liners don’t involve a question and answer. Instead, you just say an amusing sentence or two, and before you know it, the birthday boy or gal will be laughing!

Suitable for kids and adults, these are great for breaking the ice at a birthday party or writing in a birthday card.

  1. Forget about the past; you can’t change it. Forget about the future; you can’t predict it. And forget about the present. I didn’t get you one.
  2. You know you’re old when you and your teeth don’t sleep together.
  3. I’ve opened three birthday cards, and already I’m $200 up. I love being a mailman!
  4. Your birthday cake brings all the boys to the yard.
  5. This whole birthday thing is getting old. Don’t you think?
  6. Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
  7. You know you’re getting old when you attend an antique auction, and people bid on you.
  8. You know you’re old when you’re told to act your age, and you die.
  9. I finally realized my parents favored my twin brother when they asked me to blow up balloons for his surprise birthday party.
  10. Celebrating you is a piece of cake.
  11. I wanted to write some chemistry puns in your birthday card, but I wasn’t sure if I’d get a reaction.
  12. Today is your birthday, so celebrate yourself — especially if you’re still young enough to remember it!
  13. You know you’re getting old when you have more candles on your cake than friends at your party.
  14. For my wife’s birthday, I bought her a fridge freezer. I know it’s not much, but you should have seen her face light up when she opened it!
  15. Turning 21 is nothing to wine about.
  16. Happy birthday, lettuce turnip the beet!
  17. Happy birthday. You’re one in a melon.
  18. I’ve never enjoyed my surprise birthday parties because all I can think about is how good my friends are at lying to my face.
  19. My girlfriend isn’t talking to me. She said I ruined her birthday. I don’t know how. I didn’t even know it was her birthday.
  20. Break out the corkscrew because you have aged to perfection.
  21. I bought you a loaf of bread for your birthday toast.
  22. It’s always a good idea to become friends with babies. That’s free cake once a year for a lifetime.
  23. Have a grate birthday. Hope it’s not too cheesy.
  24. I read that 60 is the new 40… which is just a nice way of saying you’ll have to work an extra 25 years before you can retire.
  25. Birthdays are like bank holidays. Most of us have to work.

Silly Birthday Jokes for Friends

Silly Birthday Jokes for Friends Icon

Make your friends laugh on their birthdays! Whether they’re turning 10 or turning 40, these birthday roasts and riddles are going to have them grinning from ear to ear.

While these are fantastic for friends, you can also make these work for moms or for dads.

  1. What kind of birthday cake does Queen Elsa like?
    Anything with frosting and icing.
  2. What birthday cakes do ghosts like?
    An “I Scream” cake.
  3. Why did the student eat his homework on his birthday?
    He heard it was a piece of cake.
  4. You’re at an age where your back goes out more than you do.
  5. What did the buffalo say when his son left the birthday party?
  6. What does the witch do on her birthday?
    She spell-ebrates.
  7. Why didn’t the teddy bear eat cake on its birthday?
    He was already stuffed!
  8. What kind of candle burns longer than others?
    None. They all burn shorter.
  9. Patient: Doctor, every time I eat birthday cake, I get heartburn.
    Doctor: Next time, take the candles off.
  10. What did the bald guy say when given a comb for his birthday?
    Thanks, I’ll never part with it.
  11. What did the ocean say to the birthday boy?
    Nothing. It just waved.
  12. Looking 50 is great. If you’re 60.
  13. What do you call a noodle pretending it’s his birthday?
    An impasta.
  14. Were any famous men born on your birthday?
    No. Only babies.
  15. Why was the pig in the kitchen on its birthday?
    He was bacon himself a birthday cake.
  16. Why did the baker laugh?
    The eggs kept cracking jokes.
  17. Why couldn’t the pony sing ‘Happy Birthday’?
    She was feeling a bit hoarse.
  18. How do you know if a donut is bored at a birthday party?
    He looks glazed over.
  19. You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
  20. What do they call you when you attend a ghost’s birthday?
    The life of the party.
  21. What should you say if someone gives you dirt on your birthday?
    “I appreciate the sediment.”
  22. What do you call a bunch of balloons in the bathroom?
    A birthday potty.
  23. Wine improves with age. We improve with wine.
  24. Knock-Knock.
    Who’s there?
    Anita who?
    Anita piece of that cake!
  25. The emergency department is on speed dial just in case you have an asthma attack blowing out your candles.

Cute Birthday Puns

Cute Birthday Puns Icon

Need something innocent and sweet to celebrate a birthday? These adorable puns work great for filling in a card or sharing a birthday message on Instagram. They make for a fantastic caption, especially for teenagers!

  1. You know you’re getting older when the candles don’t fit on the cake.
  2. Yeti or not, it’s your birthday.
  3. You feta have a gouda birthday.
  4. Another birthday has crepe’d up on you.
  5. There’s no time like the present I forgot to buy!
  6. Another year to prove that older doesn’t really mean wiser.
  7. Once you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed.
  8. You’re one candle closer to starting a house fire.
  9. You’re not old. You’re aged to perfection.
  10. Have a grate birthday. Hope that’s not too cheesy.
  11. I know you don’t drink, so have a tea-riffic birthday.
  12. Hooray for me! I get to celebra-cake with you.
  13. It’s not the years in your life that count; it’s the life in your years.
  14. For the record, you’re not old. You’re a classic.
  15. You take the cake.
  16. You know what they say about more candles… a bigger wish!
  17. Gamers don’t have birthdays. They level up.
  18. On your birthday, party until you’re balloon in the face!
  19. Happy birthday to someone old enough to go vintage shopping in their own closet.
  20. Loving you is a piece of cake.
  21. I guess from now on, every birthday is a surprise!
  22. I got my dad beer for his birthday because he’s older bud wiser.
  23. Your cake is getting too hot to handle.
  24. You know you’re getting old when there’s nothing left to learn the hard way.
  25. My speech involved giving Grandpa a toast of his own medicine.

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Headshot of Beth McCallum

About the Author

Beth McCallum

Beth McCallum is a Scottish freelance writer & book blogger with a degree in creative writing, journalism and English literature. She is a mum to a young boy, and believes that it truly takes a village. When she’s not parenting, writing about parenting, or working, she can be found reading, working on her novel, taking photos, playing board games or wandering through the countryside with her family.