250+ Best Funny Birthday Wishes: Copy, Paste & Send

Funny Birthday Wishes for Him

Celebrate his special day with a touch of humor! Here’s a collection of funny birthday wishes that are sure to bring a smile to his face.

• May you live to be so old, your family talks about you in terms of geological eras.
• Here’s to another year of questionable life decisions and wild adventures!
• Happy Birthday! Don’t forget to iron that birthday suit.
• Congratulations on reaching an age when getting a “quick bite” involves your teeth coming out.
• For your birthday, I got you a gift card to your favorite store: the pharmacy.
• You’re not old, you’re just… chronologically gifted!
• May your hair dye and mascara never run! Happy Birthday, old buddy!
• At your age, let’s start celebrating the anniversary of your 29th birthday.
• Don’t think of it as getting older, think of it as becoming a classic.
• Happy Birthday! I hope you celebrate like you’re 21 – but with better judgment.
• Remember, age is just a number – like your credit card debt.
• You’re not aging; you’re just increasing in value.
• Happy Birthday! You’re one step closer to touching your balls to the water when you sit on the toilet.
• At your age, “getting lucky” means finding your car in the parking lot.
• You’re not old. You’re just old enough to know better and too young to resist.
• Another year older, but still looking marvelous! That’s not an easy feat at your age.
• Happy Birthday! Let’s raise a toast to your tolerance level for us getting higher every year.
• Don’t worry about your age, alcohol will still age better than you.
• Cheers to a man who’s still young at heart, slightly older in other places.
• You know you’re getting older when the candles cost more than the cake.
• Happy Birthday! You’re not old, you’re a retro edition.
• You’re at an age when your back goes out more than you do. Happy Birthday!
• Let’s celebrate the first time you cried naked in someone else’s bed. Happy Birthday!
• Age is just a number, but in your case, it’s quite a large number.
• Happy Birthday! Remember, it’s not about the years in your life, but the life in your beers.

Funny Birthday Wishes for Her

Tickle her funny bone on her special day with these humorous birthday wishes that are sure to bring a smile to her face.

• Happy Birthday! Remember, wine gets better with age, and you’re getting fabulous!
• You’re not older, you’re just more distinguished!
• Happy Birthday! Here’s to the years doing more wonders for you than Photoshop ever could.
• Congratulations on reaching an age where you wake up at the time you used to go to bed on a Saturday.
• Happy Birthday! Don’t worry, those aren’t gray hairs, they’re wisdom highlights.
• For your birthday, I wanted to give you something that makes you look younger… but the toy store was closed.
• Just like fine wine, you get better with age. Oh wait, that’s just you getting tipsier!
• You’re not 40; you’re 18 with 22 years of experience!
• Remember, you’re not 50, you’re $49.95 plus tax!
• Happy Birthday! May your Facebook wall be filled with messages from people you never talk to.
• May your birthday be as lit as the candles on your cake and may you be drunk to blow them out.
• Age is just a number, but in your case, it’s unlisted!
• Congratulations on being a year closer to getting the senior citizen discount!
• Happy Birthday! Remember, calories don’t count today. So let the cake eating commence!
• You know you’re getting old when your candles cost more than your cake.
• Happy Birthday! By your age, you’ve learned everything – you only have to remember it now.
• Welcome to the age where you forget your age.
• Happy Birthday! Let’s celebrate the anniversary of your clever escape from the womb.
• Remember, the best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once!
• Happy Birthday! You’re not aging, you’re just leveling up.
• You’re not old, you’re just vintage!
• Here’s to a woman who has been 30… several times!
• Happy Birthday! May your hair dye and mascara never run!
• Age is just a number, and in your case, it’s a really high one!
• Happy Birthday! Don’t count the candles, just enjoy the glow.

Short Funny Birthday Wishes

Bring a burst of laughter to their special day with these short and snappy funny birthday wishes, perfect for a quick chuckle.

• Happy Birthday! You’re not old, you’re vintage!
• Age is just a number, but in your case, it’s quite high.
• You’re not aging, you’re leveling up!
• May your hair dye and secrets always stay in the closet.
• Congrats on escaping the womb many years ago!
• You’re the perfect age to be my favorite young person.
• Happy Birthday! Act your age not your shoe size.
• Let’s toast to the only thing getting older than you – dinosaurs.
• Another year older, none the wiser.
• Happy Birthday! Spoiler alert: cake calories don’t count.
• Birthdays are like boogers, the more you have the harder it is to breathe!
• Don’t worry, I would never make fun of your age… in your hearing range.
• Happy Birthday! Welcome to the age where it’s no longer possible to lose a kilo in a day.
• You’re not 40, you’re 18 with 22 years of experience!
• Remember, with age comes… um, I forgot.
• You’re not old, just… retro.
• Cake is my favorite part of aging.
• Welcome to the age when happy hour is a nap.
• You’re at an age when your back goes out more than you do.
• Don’t count the candles, just enjoy the glow.
• Happy Birthday! Time to start lying about your age.
• Just like fine cheese, you’re only getting smellier with age!
• Happy Birthday! Remember, the antique market is booming.
• Age might just be a number, but in your case, it’s a really big number.
• Happy Birthday! You’re not old, you’re a classic.

Funny Birthday Wishes for Family

Infuse your family member’s birthday with laughter and joy through these witty and humorous birthday wishes tailored just for family fun.

• Happy Birthday! You’re not just a year older, but a year wiser, or so we hope.
• You’re not aging, you’re just upgrading!
• Happy Birthday! Remember, the more candles, the bigger the wish!
• As you blow out your candles, may your hair not catch fire!
• Happy Birthday! You’re not old, you’re a classic!
• May your birthday cake be moist and your presents be expensive!
• Congratulations on being born a really long time ago.
• Remember, you’re not 40, you’re 18 with 22 years of experience!
• Happy Birthday! Let’s toast to the only thing getting older than you – wine!
• Another year, another new place that aches.
• Happy Birthday! You’re at the age when your back goes out more than you do.
• Don’t think of it as getting older, think of it as becoming a classic.
• Age is just a number, but in your case, it’s a high score!
• For your birthday, let’s remember the good old days. You know, back when your back didn’t hurt.
• Happy Birthday! May you live to be so old, your family talks about you in terms of geological eras.
• Remember, wine gets better with age, and you’re getting fabulous!
• You’re not getting older; you’re increasing in value!
• Happy Birthday! Keep aging like fine wine and less like stinky cheese.
• On your birthday, count your candles, count your years, but never count your calories!
• Congratulations on being officially old enough to need a skincare routine.
• Happy Birthday! You’re not old, you’re retro!
• Here’s to a year of laughing until it hurts and loving until your heart is full.
• Happy Birthday! May your day be more beautiful than a unicorn farting rainbows.
• You’re not over the hill; you’re just on the second mountain!
• Happy Birthday! If anyone calls you old, hit them with your cane!

Funny Birthday Wishes for Best Friend

Celebrate your best friend’s birthday with a mix of humor and affection through these amusing birthday wishes that reflect the joy and laughter of your friendship.

• Happy Birthday! Here’s to the years we’ve shared and to the many more we’ll forget together.
• You’re not getting older; you’re just becoming a classic.
• Congratulations on being another year closer to becoming a crazy cat lady.
• May your hair dye and sense of humor never run!
• On your birthday, remember: don’t drink and text!
• You’re not old, you’re just… retro!
• For your birthday, I got you an iron. You know, to smooth out those wrinkles!
• You’re the friend I won’t forget to pick up when we’re old and escaping the nursing home.
• May your birthday be filled with laughter, wine, and more wine.
• Remember, with age comes wisdom. You’re one of the wisest people I know!
• Happy Birthday! Let’s celebrate the anniversary of your clever escape from the womb.
• Congratulations on being old enough now to run for president.
• Happy Birthday! Remember, calories in birthday cake are in direct competition with happiness.
• You’re not just a year older; you’re also a year bolder.
• Let’s make a pact to age disgracefully together. Happy Birthday!
• Happy Birthday! May your Facebook wall be filled with messages from people you barely know.
• Don’t worry about your age; it’s just a number, and so is your bank balance.
• You’re not old, you’re just… chronologically gifted!
• May your birthday cake be as sweet as our friendship and half as dense.
• Here’s to another year of laughing until we pee a little.
• Happy Birthday! You’re not 40; you’re 18 with 22 years of experience!
• Remember, we’re going to be the coolest old ladies causing trouble in the nursing homes!
• Cheers to you on your birthday! Just think, this is the oldest you’ve ever been and the youngest you’ll ever be again.
• Happy Birthday! If anyone asks, we’re still 29!
• You’re like a fine wine; you only get better with age. Or is that cheesier?

Witty Birthday Messages

Elevate the birthday fun with these clever and witty messages, perfect for adding a twist of humor to the birthday celebrations of your friends and family.

• You’re not old, you’re just… chronologically superior!
• Happy Birthday! May you live to be so old, your family talks about you in terms of geological eras.
• Age is an issue of mind over matter; if you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
• Remember, as you grow older, lie about your age, not your life.
• At your age, you’re not over the hill; you’re on the back nine!
• You’re not aging, you’re just becoming a classic.
• Happy Birthday! You’ve reached an age where your train of thought often leaves the station without you.
• Don’t think of it as getting older, think of it as becoming a legend.
• For your birthday, I was going to get you a funny card, but then I remembered you are my card.
• You’re not 40; you’re 18 with 22 years of experience!
• Congratulations, you’ve now reached the age where all compliments will be followed by “for your age.”
• Happy Birthday! I hope you celebrate like you’re 21 – but with better judgment.
• You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
• Happy Birthday! Don’t count the candles, just enjoy the glow.
• Another year older and still as sharp as a tack… stuck in a haystack.
• Remember, age is just a number – like your credit card debt.
• Happy Birthday! You’re one step closer to touching your balls to the water when you sit on the toilet.
• May your birthday be filled with laughter, wine, and more wine.
• You’re not old, you’re just old enough to know better and too young to resist.
• Happy Birthday! Let’s raise a toast to your tolerance level for us getting higher every year.
• Don’t worry about your age, alcohol will still age better than you.
• Cheers to a person who’s still young at heart, slightly older in other places.
• Age might just be a number, but in your case, it’s a really high number.
• Happy Birthday! Remember, it’s not about the years in your life, but the life in your beers.
• You’re at an age when your back goes out more than you do. Happy Birthday!

Funny Birthday Wishes for Social Media

Add a dash of humor to your social media shoutouts with these funny birthday wishes, perfect for making your friends and followers laugh on their special day.

• Happy Birthday! Here’s to another year of questionable life decisions we can post on social media!
• You’re not older, you’re just more experienced in the art of partying!
• May your birthday be as lit as the memes you share!
• Happy Birthday! Remember, age is just a hashtag.
• You’re not old; you’re just a classic in high definition!
• Happy Birthday! Let’s make your timeline as happy as Facebook thinks your life is.
• You’re not aging, you’re leveling up in the game of life.
• Happy Birthday! May your day be more beautiful than a filter.
• Don’t worry about getting older. On social media, you’re forever young!
• Happy Birthday! Here’s to a day filled with likes, comments, and a few untagged photos.
• You’re not just a year older; you’re also a year closer to qualifying for senior discounts!
• Remember, birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live!
• For your birthday, I got you a gift card to your favorite place: online shopping!
• Happy Birthday! Let’s celebrate the day your profile picture was actually taken.
• Happy Birthday! If age is just a number, then this year you’re not older, you’re just more expensive.
• You’re not getting older; you’re just becoming a classic story to share on social media.
• Happy Birthday! Today’s the only day you can get away with posting selfies all day.
• Aging gracefully is just a polite way of saying you’re slowly looking more like your profile emoji.
• Let’s celebrate your birthday in true social media style: by pretending we’re having a much better time than we really are.
• You’re not old, you just need a little more time to load.
• Happy Birthday! Here’s to celebrating a day that’s already passed in your timeline.
• May your birthday be as epic as the trending topics on Twitter.
• Happy Birthday! You’ve now reached an age where scrolling down to your birth year takes a while.
• Remember, in the world of social media, you’re not 40; you’re just 28 with 12 years of experience.
• Happy Birthday! You’re not just a year older; you’re a year closer to being that crazy person with too many cats on Instagram.
• You know you’re getting old when you throw a back out scrolling through your birthday messages.

Funny Belated Happy Birthday Wishes

Forgot their special day? Make up for it with these hilariously crafted belated birthday wishes that combine humor with heartfelt apologies.

• I’m not late wishing you a Happy Birthday, I’m just really early for next year!
• Happy Belated Birthday! I was just giving you extra time to digest your cake from last year.
• Sorry I missed your birthday, but how do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?
• I didn’t forget your birthday; I just wanted to help prolong the celebration!
• Belated Happy Birthday! Remember, a true friend takes you out for a birthday meal any day of the year.
• I know I’m late, but can we pretend I’m just really, really early for next year?
• Happy Belated Birthday! In my defense, I was distracted by cake.
• Sorry for the late wish. I was busy telling everyone how awesome you are!
• Happy Belated Birthday! Let’s consider this a reminder for your half-birthday celebration.
• I didn’t really forget your birthday… I just wanted to make you feel special today, too!
• Belated Happy Birthday! I was waiting to see if you aged before I sent my greetings.
• Sorry, I missed your birthday by a mile… I was stuck in the ‘no internet’ zone!
• Happy Belated Birthday! On the bright side, now you’re younger than your next birthday by a whole year!
• Your birthday came, your birthday went, here’s the wish I should have sent!
• Belated Happy Birthday! I thought you deserved a longer birthday, so I extended it.
• I’m not late with your birthday greeting; I’m just fashionably late.
• Happy Belated Birthday! Just think of my message as a very early one for next year.
• Sorry, I missed your birthday. I swear, my dog ate your birthday card.
• Belated Happy Birthday! I was testing your patience, and you passed!
• Happy Belated Birthday! Let’s just say I’m helping you stretch out the celebrations.
• I know I’m late, but let’s pretend I’m just being fashionably unique.
• Sorry for the late birthday wish. I was busy getting you an awesome present… which is also late.
• Happy Belated Birthday! I didn’t forget, I just wanted to surprise you… surprise!
• I’m so sorry I forgot your birthday, but how can I remember when you look 21 every year?
• Belated Happy Birthday! Remember, the best things in life are worth waiting for!

Funny Dad Joke Birthday Wishes

Infuse your dad’s birthday with laughter and joy through these witty and amusing dad joke wishes, guaranteed to bring a smile and an eye-roll or two.

• Happy Birthday! I’d tell you a joke about aging, but it’s an old one.
• You’re not old, you’re just… experienced. And boy, have you had a lot of experience!
• Happy Birthday! You know you’re getting old when your candles cost more than the cake.
• For your birthday, I was going to make a joke about time… but it’s not really ‘current’.
• Happy Birthday! I’d bake you a cake, but I don’t think you need any more ‘batter’ around your waist.
• Don’t think of it as getting older, think of it as becoming a classic. Dad, you’re a real ‘vintage’ now!
• Happy Birthday! You’re at that age where you still remember your passwords but forget why you needed them.
• You know, they say wisdom comes with age. So, dad, you must be really wise by now!
• Happy Birthday! Are you feeling ‘rad’? Because you’re a rad dad!
• Don’t worry, dad. Age is just a number, and so is your golf score.
• Happy Birthday! Remember, you’re not old, you’re just ‘seasoned’.
• You’re not getting older, dad. You’re just getting closer to becoming a legend.
• Happy Birthday! They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but you still manage to surprise us!
• You might be losing your hair, but you’re definitely not losing your charm!
• Happy Birthday! Don’t think of it as gray hair, think of it as ‘wisdom highlights’.
• For your birthday, I wanted to give you something priceless – my presence. Get it?
• You’re not just a year older; you’re also a year better at dad jokes!
• Happy Birthday! Let’s cut the cake before it ‘bails’ on us!
• Age is just a number, but in your case, it’s quite a large number.
• Happy Birthday! You’re not old, you’re a classic edition.
• Remember, on your birthday, calories don’t count. That’s my gift to you!
• You’re at an age where your back goes out more than you do. Happy Birthday!
• Happy Birthday! If anyone calls you old, hit them with your cane!
• Let’s celebrate the first time you cried naked in someone else’s bed. Happy Birthday!
• Age is just a number, but in your case, it’s a high score. Happy Birthday!

Funny Long Distance Birthday Messages

Send laughter across the miles with these funny long distance birthday messages, perfect for letting loved ones far away know they’re in your thoughts and in your jokes.

• Happy Birthday! We’re so far apart I almost sent you a telegram.
• Don’t worry about your age, in this time zone you’re still young!
• Happy Birthday! I was going to send you a cake, but I didn’t think it would survive the journey.
• You’re not getting older, you’re just increasing in value… across different time zones!
• Happy Birthday! Remember, the further away you are, the larger the presents have to be!
• Even though you’re miles away, my love for you is here to stay… along with a couple of age jokes!
• Happy Birthday! I’d sing you a song but you’re so far away you might only hear it next year.
• Don’t let distance get you down. On the bright side, you can celebrate your birthday in two different time zones!
• You might be out of sight, but you’re not out of cake… I mean mind!
• Since you’re so far away, I’ll save you a slice of cake… but I can’t promise it’ll last.
• Happy Birthday! The good news is that distance means you’re closer to some place where your birthday has already started.
• Wishing you a birthday that’s out of this world… just like the distance between us!
• Happy Birthday! You’re so far away I almost sent this message by carrier pigeon.
• The only thing longer than the distance between us is the list of jokes I have about your age!
• Happy Birthday! I’d give you a hug, but I’d need really, really long arms.
• Even though you’re miles away, our friendship is strong enough to make fun of your age from here!
• Happy Birthday! If we were any further apart, I’d have to congratulate you by smoke signal.
• Since you’re far away, I’ll just loudly sing ‘Happy Birthday’ and hope the wind carries it to you.
• You’re not just older, you’re wiser… and with your age, that’s a lot of wisdom to travel this distance!
• Happy Birthday! We might be continents apart, but our friendship can cover that distance – unlike my Wi-Fi signal.
• Remember, long distance means you get to extend your birthday as long as it takes my gift to reach you!
• Happy Birthday! At least the distance means you can’t see my terrible wrapping job on your present.
• You’re like a fine wine, you get better with age… and with distance, I can’t even see the wrinkles!
• Happy Birthday! I’d pop out of a cake for you, but I think I’d get lost on the way there.
• Since we’re so far apart, I’m sending you this virtual hug and an IOU for a birthday drink!

Emoji Funny Birthday Wishes

Elevate your birthday messages with a playful twist using emojis! These funny birthday wishes infused with popular emojis bring humor and modern flair to your greetings.

• Happy Birthday! 🎉 Hope you’re ready to 🕺💃 till dawn!
• You’re not getting older, you’re just leveling up! 🎮🆙
• 🎂 Happy Birthday! May your day be as sweet and colorful as a 🦄 farting rainbows.
• 🎁🎈 Wishing you a day full of surprises and joy… and less of 🤦‍♂️ moments!
• Happy Birthday! 🍻 Here’s to another year of fabulous adventures and 🤪 moments!
• You’re not old, you’re a classic! 👴➡️🏛️
• 🎉🎂 Another year wiser… or just another year closer to getting away with bad jokes?
• Happy Birthday! 🚀 Ready to blast off into another year of amazing experiences!
• 👑 Happy Birthday to the queen/king of sass! Stay fabulous and keep slaying! 💅
• May your birthday be as awesome as you are… which is 🤯 mind-blowing!
• 🥳🎈 Age is just a number, but let’s party like it’s a really important number!
• Happy Birthday! 🍰🍭 Hope your day is filled with sweetness and zero 🐍 drama.
• 🎂 Happy Birthday! May your day be more sparkling than a ✨ and less chaotic than a 🐒!
• You’re not just a year older, you’re also a year bolder! 💪🎉
• 🍾🥂 Cheers to you! May your birthday be as bubbly and intoxicating as champagne!
• 🐱🎉 Happy Birthday! You’re officially one year closer to becoming a crazy cat person!
• 🎉🎊 May your birthday be as epic as a 🎬 movie premiere!
• Happy Birthday! Here’s to smashing this year like you smash these 🎮🕹️!
• 🎂🕯️Blow out your candles and make a wish… but maybe not for more 🧁, you’ve had enough!
• 🚀🌟 Happy Birthday! Keep reaching for the stars, even if you need a little rocket help!
• 🎂🥳 Another year, another reason to celebrate… and maybe a reason to start using anti-aging cream!
• Happy Birthday! 🎈🎉 Let’s fill this day with fun, laughter, and absolutely no 🚫 adulting!
• 🎁🛍️ Wishing you a day full of surprises and happiness – and not just in your Facebook notifications!
• Happy Birthday! 🐥🎂 You’re not getting older, just more 🦉 wise… and maybe a bit 🦆 quacky!
• 🎈🎊 Here’s to a year of crushing goals and making dreams happen, just like you crush 🍪 cookies!

Funny Birthday Quotes

Laughter is the key to a memorable birthday. These funny birthday quotes from well-known figures are perfect for adding a touch of humor to any birthday celebration.

• “Time is a great healer, but a terrible beautician.” – Lucille Ball
• “The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.” – Lucille Ball
• “As you get older, three things happen: The first is your memory goes, and I can’t remember the other two.” – Norman Wisdom
• “You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.” – Bob Hope
• “Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” – Jack Benny
• “The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.” – Betty White
• “Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.” – Charles Schulz
• “You’re only young once, but you can be immature forever.” – Germaine Greer
• “Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.” – Cora Harvey Armstrong
• “Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.” – Larry Lorenzoni
• “Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you’ve got to start young.” – Fred Astaire
• “Middle age is when you still believe you’ll feel better in the morning.” – Bob Hope
• “The first hundred years are the hardest.” – Wilson Mizner
• “You know you’re old when the only thing you want for your birthday is not to be reminded of it.” – Unknown
• “Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.” – Daniel Francois Esprit Auber
• “Age is not important unless you’re a cheese.” – Helen Hayes
• “Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty.” – Joan Rivers
• “Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.” – Edward Morykwas
• “You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.” – George Burns
• “The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.” – E. Joseph Cossman
• “I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.” – Phyllis Diller
• “A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.” – Robert Frost
• “Life is short. Eat dessert first.” – Jacques Torres
• “Birthdays are like boogers. The more you have, the harder it is to breathe!” – Unknown
• “Every time a woman turns 30, a cougar is born.” – Unknown